Movies
Breaking down Breaking Dawn
March 11, 2012
Natalia says I should issue a SPOILER ALERT… but the way I see it, I’d be doing anyone that hasn’t seen this movie a FAVOR by telling you exactly how horrible it is.
So, we finally got around to watching the 4th Twilight movie. Each subsequent movie from the first, I’ve loathed more and more. Below you will find actual excerpts from our conversation as we watched the movie…
PAUSE.
Luis: Who is he?!
PAUSE.
Luis: Are you freaking kidding me?!
PAUSE.
Luis: We’re 40 minutes into the movie, and there’s no plot yet.. WHATsoever
Natalia: Lulu! This is ONLY part 1!
PAUSE.
Luis: Please tell me she’s not ALREADY pregnant.
PAUSE.
Luis: So, I’m kind of confused as to which side I’m supposed to be on. Am I supposed to be on the side that wants to rip Bella to shreds? Or the side that wants to protect her?
Natalia: You choose.
Luis: It’s just that they created a character that’s **heavy on the sarcasm** SO likable, that I just don’t know who I’m supposed to side with.
Natalia: (Blank stare)
PAUSE.
Luis: So, are they going to imprint on each other here in the forest? Or wait till they get home and imprint in bed… like Bella and Edward.
PAUSE.
Luis: Why are you defending this!?
Natalia: Because I’ve decided that I like it!
Luis: So you admit it!!
Natalia: Well, it’s not so much THAT, as it is that I feel like I just HAVE to oppose you :)
(Scene where Bella drinks blood) PAUSE.
Luis: Eww this is gross!!
Natalia: You know what!? Why don’t you press pause, and go upstairs.
Luis: Baby (to Graciela.. that’s what I call her), if you needed human blood, I’d get it for you.
Natalia: (Eyeroll)
PAUSE.
Luis: Who thought up this crap!? I mean really… here’s what they must’ve been thinking “OH, I KNOW… WE CAN HAVE BELLA GIVE CONCEIVE 2 SECONDS AFTER THEY DO IT… AND LET’S MAKE THE BABY SOME UNKNOWN DEMON CHILD THAT KILLS HER FROM THE INSIDE…. AND LET’S HAVE HER GIVE BIRTH TO IT IN LIKE 2 WEEKS WHEN HER SPINE BREAKS IN TWO… BRILLIANT!!!!….. OHHHHHH OHHHHHH!! AND CHECK THIS… WE CAN HAVE BELLA BE ALL SCRAWNY AND GROSS…. THINK OF ONE OF THOSE ETHIOPIANS YOU SEE ON THE COVER OF NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC…. AND THEN!!! WE CAN HAVE THE BIRTH SCENE BE ALL BLOODY AND HER HUSBAND CAN STICK HIS HEAD IN HER C-SECTION INCISION AND GOBBLE AROUND UP IN THERE…….. AND THEN I GOT IT!!!! WE CAN HAVE JACOB IMPRINT ON THE CGI BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OSCAR! HERE WE COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This was a deliciously terrible movie, with characters so unlikable, I wanted them all to die. Oh, and the ending wrapped up all drama/conflict so nicely, there is absolutely NO NEED for a part 2. And thus ends the Twilight series in my eyes.
BTTF
January 24, 2012
Make no mistake about it. The Back to the Future films are my favorite of all-time. I don’t know what it is about them that makes it to where I can enjoy them over and over and over. This week I’ve been re-watching them and it hurts me when I have to stop it so I can continue it after class, or after changing the baby, or after I wake up the next day….
Yeah, there are major continuity errors (it’s time travel, cut ‘em some slack), yeah it reeks of eighties cheese… I know. That doesn’t change the fact that I loves me some Delorean, Flux Capacitor, and HOVER BOARD!
In honor of this, my favorite movie, I present you with the kick-A theme music!!
Harry Potter’s Last Stand
September 2, 2011
This post has been sitting in the Drafts folder for ages. The only thing here was the above image, and title of the post. The rest of the draft was empty… so, I’ll try to do as best I can to remember what I wanted to say.
Oh yeah. I remember. I was disappointed with the last Harry Potter movie. I mean, it was awesome and all, but it just couldn’t compete with the movie I had already made for myself in my mind. What’s weird is, I loved Movie 7.1 while others didn’t. Then I was disappointed in 7.2 where others weren’t.
Anyhow, I hope you enjoy the above pic!
The Lone Movie-Goer
April 7, 2011
I’ve recently become enchanted with going to watch movies A) on a weekday, B) early, C) ALONE.
It’s actually quite enjoyable. Some of the recent movies I’ve watched like this are:
- Scott Pilgrim vs. the World
- Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Part 1)
- Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules
Yesterday, I ventured out and watched the last one on the list above. When I walked into the theater for the 11:45 AM showing, the entire place was empty (with the exception of about 5 adults & kids up at the very top row).
As is customary in stadium-seating theaters, there’s railing in front of the front row (not the VERY front, but the front of the stadium-seats). This is my absolute favorite place to sit. I can put my feet without bothering anyone.
Throughout the movie, I found myself slouching, and sitting in odd (yet comfortable) positions, not having to worry about bothering people next to, or behind me. It was awesome! Not the BEST movie-going experience I’ve had, but very very close to it.
I did feel a little concerned about what people thought of a man going to watch a children’s movie by himself, with no kids in-toe… but I got over it.
Oh yeah, and I loved the movie! Here was one of my favorite parts, when Greg and Rowley attempt to make a viral video:
Confession #9
March 24, 2011
My name is Luis Merino and I confess that I absolutely loved the children’s movie Diary of a Wimpy Kid, and am SUPER excited for the sequel (opening THIS weekend) Rodrick Rules.
I haven’t read the books (and really, don’t intend to). I can’t quite explain why, but upon watching Diary, I found myself captivated. Although it was clearly a kids movie, the humor wasn’t contrived or childish, the performances were sharp, and the style was refreshing. I enjoyed it almost in the same way I enjoyed Scott Pilgrim (and we all know I LOVED me some Scott Pilgrim).
At some point this weekend, I WILL WATCH THIS MOVIE. What do you say Natalia?
Natalia: I’m okay with that… only because it’s NOT a cartoon.
The SoNet vs. the AccBill
January 18, 2011
Earlier this month I finished reading The Accidental Billionaires, the novel written by Ben Mezrich on which the film The Social Network is based.
I absolutely loved The Social Network and to be honest, I’m not exactly sure why. It could be the excellent script… or the stellar acting… possibly the amazing musical score… or is it the story itself– a college no-one invents something that changes the world… a no-one who was born only weeks after myself.
Although the novel was well-written and entertaining on its own, my first reaction was that it lacked a lot of the background I was hoping to find. But as I’m typing this, I’m not quite sure what it was I was hoping to find. The novel did go slightly further in depth and was probably more anchored in reality, but it still left me wanting to know more.
Regardless, the novel was a truly entertaining read– that was unfortunately spoiled the excellent movie.
iHeart: Charlie Chaplin
December 11, 2010
Along with the film editing class this semester, I also took Major Figures in Cinema. This particular section focused primarily on Charles Chaplin. For those who don’t know who this man was, he:
- was possibly the biggest star cinema’s silent film era
- was born and raised in England
- directed, produced, starred in, and composed his larger feature length films
- was riddled with controversy in his personal life
- was exiled from the United States in 1953 (J. Edgar Hoover thought he was a Commie)
- only returned to the US for 10 days in 1973 to accept an Oscar
- passed away on Christmas Day in 1977
I remember my first experience with any of Chaplin’s works was during an Intro to Film class I took one summer at BYU in 2005. We watched his 1931 masterpiece City Lights. I was floored. I didn’t know silent films could be so genuinely funny, yet compelling at the same time. I had no idea Charlie Chaplin was such a genius, and one I would consider to be the father of Comedic film. Not only was he an amazing comedian, he was also a truly gifted storyteller.
Here are some of my favorites from his very extensive filmography:
- The Kid is Chaplin’s first feature length movie. The Little Tramp (the character Chaplin is famous for) finds an orphan baby and raises it as his own. Years later, Social services try to take the boy away from his adoptive father, as seen here:
- The Gold Rush is the film that features this FAMOUS scene:
- City Lights is my favorite. The ending is very sweet. Here’s the funny boxing sequence from that film:
- The Great Dictator was the film Chaplin made ridiculing Adolf Hitler and the Nazi movement. Chaplin said that had he known the full extent of the Nazi atrocities, he would not have made this film (because of how light he makes of something that he did not know was SO serious). It’s a very funny film with a truly powerful speech at the end.
Little know that Chaplin actually wrote the music for “Smile” a song used in his film Modern Times. It was covered during an episode of Glee last season:
He was truly a fascinating subject to study and learn about this semester. Robert Downey, Jr., gave an Oscar-nominated portrayal of Charlie in the 1992 biopic Chaplin. Here’s the trailer for that movie:
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