Our Chemistry
Breaking down Breaking Dawn
March 11, 2012
Natalia says I should issue a SPOILER ALERT… but the way I see it, I’d be doing anyone that hasn’t seen this movie a FAVOR by telling you exactly how horrible it is.
So, we finally got around to watching the 4th Twilight movie. Each subsequent movie from the first, I’ve loathed more and more. Below you will find actual excerpts from our conversation as we watched the movie…
PAUSE.
Luis: Who is he?!
PAUSE.
Luis: Are you freaking kidding me?!
PAUSE.
Luis: We’re 40 minutes into the movie, and there’s no plot yet.. WHATsoever
Natalia: Lulu! This is ONLY part 1!
PAUSE.
Luis: Please tell me she’s not ALREADY pregnant.
PAUSE.
Luis: So, I’m kind of confused as to which side I’m supposed to be on. Am I supposed to be on the side that wants to rip Bella to shreds? Or the side that wants to protect her?
Natalia: You choose.
Luis: It’s just that they created a character that’s **heavy on the sarcasm** SO likable, that I just don’t know who I’m supposed to side with.
Natalia: (Blank stare)
PAUSE.
Luis: So, are they going to imprint on each other here in the forest? Or wait till they get home and imprint in bed… like Bella and Edward.
PAUSE.
Luis: Why are you defending this!?
Natalia: Because I’ve decided that I like it!
Luis: So you admit it!!
Natalia: Well, it’s not so much THAT, as it is that I feel like I just HAVE to oppose you :)
(Scene where Bella drinks blood) PAUSE.
Luis: Eww this is gross!!
Natalia: You know what!? Why don’t you press pause, and go upstairs.
Luis: Baby (to Graciela.. that’s what I call her), if you needed human blood, I’d get it for you.
Natalia: (Eyeroll)
PAUSE.
Luis: Who thought up this crap!? I mean really… here’s what they must’ve been thinking “OH, I KNOW… WE CAN HAVE BELLA GIVE CONCEIVE 2 SECONDS AFTER THEY DO IT… AND LET’S MAKE THE BABY SOME UNKNOWN DEMON CHILD THAT KILLS HER FROM THE INSIDE…. AND LET’S HAVE HER GIVE BIRTH TO IT IN LIKE 2 WEEKS WHEN HER SPINE BREAKS IN TWO… BRILLIANT!!!!….. OHHHHHH OHHHHHH!! AND CHECK THIS… WE CAN HAVE BELLA BE ALL SCRAWNY AND GROSS…. THINK OF ONE OF THOSE ETHIOPIANS YOU SEE ON THE COVER OF NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC…. AND THEN!!! WE CAN HAVE THE BIRTH SCENE BE ALL BLOODY AND HER HUSBAND CAN STICK HIS HEAD IN HER C-SECTION INCISION AND GOBBLE AROUND UP IN THERE…….. AND THEN I GOT IT!!!! WE CAN HAVE JACOB IMPRINT ON THE CGI BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OSCAR! HERE WE COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This was a deliciously terrible movie, with characters so unlikable, I wanted them all to die. Oh, and the ending wrapped up all drama/conflict so nicely, there is absolutely NO NEED for a part 2. And thus ends the Twilight series in my eyes.
crepe shack and waffles
March 5, 2012
Natalia: Did I ever tell you about the first time that I had crepes like these?
Luis: In the Tokyo airport and you never saw them anywhere again until you found them in Henderson?
Natalia: Yep, that’s the story.
Luis: I hope these are as good as you’ve made them out to be.
Natalia: Oh they’re way better. How can you go wrong with a freshly made crepe wrapped waffle-cone style around delicious toppings? I’m getting strawberries, bananas, birthday cake ice cream and caramel in mine.
Luis: That looks good, but I think I’d rather have a waffle made to order… with strawberries, bananas…
Natalia: Copycat
Luis: … and Nutella and vanilla ice cream.
Natalia: So what did you think?.
Luis: It was good.
Natalia: No, it was GREAT!!!
What is MARCHtinso?
March 2, 2012
Luis: Okay, so let’s figure out what we’re gonna do for MARCHtinso…
Natalia: Okay.
Luis: (glancing over at Natalia’s phone) Oh, you’re playing Tiny Tower, now?
Natalia: Yeah. But I don’t get it.
Luis: Which reminds me… I need to get that new Simpsons iPhone game that came out today…
12 minutes later…
Luis: This game is WAY too complicated. Oh, you’re still playing Tiny Tower?
Natalia: Yeah. I STILL don’t get it.
Luis: Okay, okay, okay… what are we going to do for MARCHtinso?
Natalia: I don’t like these new bed sheets. It feels like I’m laying on sand paper.
Luis: Oh come on! They’re not that bad.
Natalia: Seriously, I scraped my knee.
Luis: Okay… so MARCHtinso… let’s think. Think-think-THINK..
Luis hits his stomach like a drum…
Natalia: You better not wake up the baby!!
What is MARCHtinso? Post your guesses below.
Luis is a drama queen
April 3, 2011
Luis: (on Facebook) There’s no church and it’s my birthday… I DESERVE TO GET AT LEAST 5 HRS OF SLEEP. But nooo, the fire alarm has to be chirping telling me its battery is low……… grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Natalia: (on Facebook) So you remedy the situation by waking ME up
Luis: (in person) Well, sorrrrr-eeeeee Mrs. Thang… next time, I’ll just fall off the chair, roll down the stairs, and smash my big ol’ head onto the hard tile floor!!
Natalia: (in person) Uh, can we get a little more dramatic… please?
Luis: There’s plenty more where that came from.
AUDIO: Portuguese Schmortuguese
April 2, 2011
Natalia talks with her mom… a lot. Which is a good thing. Often times, I find myself listening to Natalia go on and on and on and on and on about stuff in Portuguese. Sometimes I’m able to understand and follow along, most of the time, I’m just in my own little world. Then there are times when I engage in a fun little pastime of mine.
Behold!
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PS. There are more of you that need to “Follow” us off to the right. You better do it, or we’re gonna call you out … BY NAME!!! And it won’t be pretty!
AUDIO: What to blog about?
March 28, 2011
I’ve been really wanting to do another audio post, but I’m not sure we have any ideas. Against Natalia’s suggestion that this clip was stupid and lame, I decided to just post it anyway:
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As you can see… I may, or may NOT have some secret fascination with other people’s blogs. Whose? You’ll never know. … ;)
Natalia: For the record, I had every intention of naming names, but Luis kept covering up my mouth and yelling, “Nooooooooo!”
Any ideas as to what we can Audio (or Video) blog about?
LIVE: Baby Gender Reveal
March 12, 2011
For the first 9 minutes we talked about the Ultrasound appointment. To skip ahead to the GENDER REVEAL, jump to 9:50. Afterward we answered a question or 2.
Natalia: I just want to add an apology for the gum chewing. I know it is not polite, but it helps to me to not get so nauseous (at least psychologically it helps… please don’t judge me for my craziness).
EDIT: Thanks for everyone who tuned in! We had 15 viewers watch us. Press play below to watch the taped broadcast!
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